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Now Is The Time To Get Out And Make Memories

Think back over your lifetime and recall your most delightful memories.  The ones that make you smile, laugh, give your heart an extra jump, or just sigh a breath of peace thinking about it.

Some of us will immediately jump back to childhood memories, others will recall times in their 20s–young and free, while others may need only look back a month or two to a trip taken to celebrate a wedding anniversary.  Depending on your personality, your favorite memories may involve daredevil type activities that provide adrenaline surges that will last for days, or for some, like me, the memory need only feature a beach, walking shoes, delicious food, and a good book.

Now I’m a huge believer in making sweet memories in your everyday life, from enjoying the beauty of your surroundings, to special moments with a loved one, to using your special dishes to serve yourself breakfast each morning, but I’m talking about getting out and making memories.  Memories that take a little work to plan and even pay for…the BIG memories.

Maybe it’s a trip to a faraway tropical place, a cross-country trip, stopping to visit all of the National Forests, travelling abroad, visits to historical sites, hikes that take you through multiple states, and so on.

I think we should place a little more effort into making big memories, before our opportunities slip away.

None of us are guaranteed another day here on this earth, so what are we waiting for?

Let’s all plan our next BIG adventure!

Of course, it’s wise to be smart about this.  I’m not proposing we all quit our jobs and go travel across Europe for the next six months, relying on the kindness of others to feed and house us.

Start the planning process now.  Even if you’re planning for something five years down the road (I hope you and I don’t have to wait that long), start dreaming now.  In case you missed it, check out my post about how half the fun of an event is the anticipation of it.

Here’s our mantra:

No more excuses.
Dream BIG.
Make a plan.
Go and do.
Repeat.

So, what do you think? What trip or epic experience is running through your mind right now?

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Do The Next Thing

You know what I want for all of us?  Hint: It’s my favorite thing to write about on this blog and to personally strive for in my everyday life: Joyful, intentional, balanced living.

Dictionary.com defines these words as follows:

Joyful:  Full of joy, as a person or one’s heart; glad; delighted.
Intentional: Done with intention or on purpose.
Balanced: Being in harmonious or proper arrangement or adjustment, proportion,etc.

Joy.  Purpose.  Harmony.  I feel a song coming on!!

If only it were as easy as singing a song and — voila! Done.  We live happily ever after, day after day, with joy, purpose, and harmony.

The problem is when we have those those long days (and sometimes even weeks) where we feel frustrated, stuck, exhausted, or overwhelmed.

Those awful days that steal our joy, have us forgetting that we do have a significant purpose, and those days that we feel so out of whack, that balance is the farthest thing from what we feel.

I’ve just experienced a bit of this feeling recently and after I let myself sit in the dumps for a bit, I decided to follow one piece of advice that is like a miracle cure to get you back on the joyful, intentional, balanced train.

Do.  The.  Next.  Thing.  

That’s it!

Remember the song, Put One Foot In Front of The Other?  It’s as simple as that.

It sounds pretty easy, especially when you’re singing that song, but when you’re feeling depressed, unmotivated, confused, anxious, overwhelmed, ticked-off, unsure, worthless, unhappy, or even just lazy, it’s not easy — at all.

I find when things are hard like this, the key is to break projects down into small actionable steps and pick one thing to do.  Now don’t overthink it.  If you start to overthink it, don’t allow yourself.  Pick one thing and start with that.  Who cares if it’s not the most critical thing that needs to be done?!  We’re not in the frame of mind to be hyper-organized right now!  After you do that first thing, then do the next thing.

For example, say you have people coming over in a couple hours and you’re on the verge of cancelling everything because your house is trashed, you’re in a bad mood, and the cat just puked on the floor.

My suggestion is to clean the cat puke up first, otherwise you might step in it later and then you’re really gonna fly off the handle or just sit down and cry.

Then…

Make yourself go into one room that people you have coming over will see, jot down the top 2-3 things that need to be done and do the one on the top of your list. Then…do the next thing.  Then…do the next thing.  Then, move on to the next room and do the same thing.

Did you see what happened?  You just got that one room ready by practicing doing the next thing.

At this point, as you begin to tackle the next room, a strange whistling sound may escape your mouth!  Yes, you may begin to feel happy, because you’re getting stuff done, my friend!

Now, imagine you’re so flustered that the thought of even writing a 2-3 item to-do list per room will send you over the edge.  That’s ok.  You, my friend, are going to go into one of the rooms that people will see and look down or off to the side and pick something up.  Take that thing and put it in its proper place.  Continue in that same room, just doing the next thing until the room is sufficiently ready to be used by you and your guests.

These “next things” can span from changing the next diaper, to picking up the next dust-bunny, to writing the next check, to paying your bills, to pulling the next weed, to putting the next dish in the dishwasher, to writing that next sentence in your journal, to calling the next house repair person on your list, to writing that next proposal, to mailing that next condolence card, to filling out the next online form, to calling the next person you need to follow up with on something….

You see where I’m going with this?  There is major power in just doing the next thing.  When you create momentum by doing the next thing, it will help bring you to a place of joy, intention, and balance.  That’s the way we’re supposed to be living!

You might not be able to achieve it in one afternoon, but as that momentum builds, you start creating order in your life which allows room for joy, intention, and balance.

Here’s to you leading a joyful, intentional, and balanced life, one step at a time!

Jill xx

P.S. You know others are going through this same thing, how about sharing this with them to help get them moving in the right direction?

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How an Early-Morning Routine Will Make Your Life Better

What’s your morning routine like?  Slow and relaxing, or rushed and stressful?  Are you an actual “morning person”, or does it take at least two cups of coffee for the sleep cobwebs to clear and for you to even consider uttering a word?  Are you productive in the morning?

About 18 months ago, I began a morning routine that has drastically changed my life for the better.  I began waking up around 4:30 a.m. — on purpose!  Why on earth would a sane person do this?

For me, the driving force was my desire to write.  My daily routine and choices at the time didn’t allow me time in the day or evening to write, so I had to create some brand new space within the existing 24-hour period.

If you’re cringing at the idea of getting up before the crack of dawn even thinks about cracking, let me share my three favorite things about this time of day (or is it night??).  First of all, it’s the most quiet and peaceful time of day.  There’s really nothing like it.  No one’s calling or knocking and if you have kids or animals, they should still be sleeping.  Second, your will-power and focus is super strong early in the morning because you don’t have anything else pulling at you, and you’ve not exhausted many brain cells yet. And lastly, whatever you accomplish during this time feels like a bonus.  It’s as if you’ve created a few extra magical hours in the day that no one else knows about.

Well, I want you to know about these magical hours!  I want you to experience the good that can happen in your life by creating an early-morning routine.

By creating this new space in my day, I had to make some life changes.  In order to get up at 4:30 a.m., I had to go to bed earlier.  I do best on 7-8 hours of sleep, so that means lights out at 8:30 or 9 p.m.  This was a big adjustment for me because I really enjoyed settling down and watching television about that time.  So much so, that we decided to go ahead and get rid of the television altogether.  This may sound severe, but taking that distraction away and saving on the Cable bill worked for us.  (P.S. Don’t worry, my husband was on board…he didn’t watch the tube much anyway.)

So now I can’t tell you what’s happening on HGTV, Food Network or Bravo, but I get to write, and that’s been such a valuable outlet for me.  And, because I choose to get up extra early, this also allows me time to work on other things that are important to me, both spiritually and physically.

If you don’t already have an early-morning routine, I strongly recommend you try it out.  Just try for one month and see how it works for you.  I’m telling you–it’s life-changing!  I’ve heard from several die-hard night owls, that switched to an early-morning routine, and they say they will never go back to their night owl ways.

A few tips to help you as you think about trying this out:

  1.  What’s your why?  What’s important enough for you to make this change?  I choose to focus on mind, body, and soul stuff.  When I put these three areas at the top of my priority list, everything else in my life is better.
  2.  Don’t cheat yourself on sleep.  A proper amount of sleep is critical to your well-being.  The National Sleep Foundation recommends 7+ hours/night for adults.
  3. What gets written down, gets done.  Write out a schedule for your morning routine and follow it.  Making your morning routine a habit helps you to stick with it.
    Here’s my schedule as an example:

Monday – Friday

4:40 a.m.: Wake up and give thanks for three things before getting out of bed.
4:45 a.m.: Make coffee and do neck exercises.
4:50 a.m.: Pray and Bible study.
5:30 a.m.: Write.
6:15 a.m.: Exercise 3x/week.  Read for fun 2x/week.
7:00 a.m.: Feed dogs.
7:05 a.m.: Make/eat breakfast.
7:20 a.m.: Play Bananagrams.
7:30 a.m.: Shower/dress/tidy/fetch the dogs.
8:00 a.m.: Begin work day.

I’d love to hear about your early-morning routine, if you already have one.  How is your life better because of it?  If you don’t already have an early-morning routine, I’d love to hear that you’ll give it a shot.  Let me know in the comments below.

Have a happy day!

Jill xx

 

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Mother’s Day

A friend asked me yesterday if Mother’s Day was a sad or hard time for me since I lost my mom (she was only 59 and died of alcoholism).  I thought I’d share my thoughts on this, since I know there are others out there who’ve lost their mama’s, too, and can probably relate to some degree. IMG_0331

Yes, the day with its big obvious name and all, has a tendency to make me sad when I think about my loss.  My thoughts oscillate between romantic thoughts of what could have been, to what should have been, to what never would have been, to a question I’ve asked God so many times, “Why?!”.  My heart also aches thinking about the emotional and physical pain my mom must have experienced…enough to lose her life to addiction.

As I write this, I’m 12 years out and have learned that healing takes time, sadness never completely disappears, our journeys would never be as rich if the path were only paved with gold, nothing is wasted–unless we let it, and, most importantly, God is a good and loving God.

Then there’s Billy.

Mother’s Day, while having its sad parts, also happens to be one of my favorite days of the year because 20 years ago, I became Billy’s mama.  He’s been a source of joy to me since his first breath.  (I doubt he’s reading this, but, if so…mama loves you, Bills!!)

Now, let’s talk about a super special category which is comprised of women who deserve HUGE recognition on Mother’s Day.  They are step-moms, foster-moms, surrogate moms, classroom moms, orphanage-worker mamas, and women who may or may not have children of their own, but love on other people’s children as if they were their own.  Ladies, my heart fills with gratitude as I think of you on Mother’s Day.  You may not have birthed these babies, but your influence on their lives makes this world a better place.

With this being said, I’d like to recognize one of those super special people in my life.  “Mama Judy” has been in my life for nearly three decades and has loved me as if I were her real daughter.  That’s why I call her my “bonus mom.”  Thank you for loving me well, Mama Judy!

And finally, I offer a special prayer of peace and comfort for those precious mama’s out there who have lost a child.  I cannot imagine what you’ve been through, and I’m deeply sorry for your loss.

With a heart of sadness, gratitude, love, hope, and thanksgiving, all at the same time, here’s to honoring Mother’s Day for all that it stands for.

Jill xx

Have you lost a parent to alcohol or drug addiction?  I wrote an article that you might find helpful…click here to read.

And here’s a follow up article I wrote after receiving lots of feedback on the first article.  I hope this helps too.

 

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