The Beauty of Living a Life of Balance
Have you noticed that a lot of people are running around with a crazed look in their eyes?
The other day, I was talking with a friend and I let out this weird cackle-laugh that I had never heard before! The translation of my cackle was “Oh my gosh, I love talking to you and what you just said was seriously funny, but I have 1,467 things to do before I leave for my vacation!!!”
So maybe we all feel a bit frazzled before leaving for vacation, but if we look around us and, better yet, look within ourselves — we may notice that we are all stumbling around a bit unbalanced.
Answer me this: On a scale from 1 to 10, 10 being super-balanced, to 1 being on the verge of falling apart, where do you stand in the balance department?
I would guess that most of us have been or are currently in the lower half. If you are reading this and happen to fall in the super-balanced end of the spectrum, feel free to skip to the end of this post and leave a comment with your best tips. Sharing is caring, people!
So, if you find yourself in a place where you are stressed, maybe even resentful of the direction your days go, read on, there is hope to be found here.
Let’s talk about some ideas and actionable steps to creating a life of beautiful balance.
Realize and admit you need to make some changes.
The first step to positive change is admitting there is work to be done, adjustments to be made. This seems like an easy step, but many of us have a hard time admitting that we don’t have it all together. Here’s the deal, not one single person on earth has it all together. Each and every one of us has room for improvement.
Stop the comparison game.
Live your life, not your neighbor’s life. You were created for a specific purpose, with gifts that are specially yours. The most honorable thing you can do is to be who you were meant to be.
Write a top 10 priority list.
What are the non-negotiables in your life? Be specific here. If riding 100 miles/week on your bike is critical to your well-being, include that. Don’t leave off the boring stuff, like doing laundry and yard maintenance.
Remember that this is not a bucket list. It’s a list of things that need to get done on a regular basis type of list.
Also remember that you want to enjoy your life, so including hobby or exercise time is not only fun but is beneficial to your health.
NOTE: non-negotiables will change throughout your life. It’s a good idea to review this list at least once per year.
Here is my list as an example:
Take a look at your calendar.
Write down or print out a full typical month of your calendar. Many of us may not include grocery shopping, picking up dry cleaning, visiting a friend in the hospital, etc. in our calendar, but for this exercise, adding these items is important. Don’t get caught up in the details of exact shopping times or days of the week, just get it all down on paper.
Reflection time: Are your calendar and top 10 priority list in sync?
Just Say NO!
Now that you’ve got it all down in black and white, do you see anything glaringly obvious that you just don’t have time for?
It’s time to make some cuts.
If you are a parent, it may be that hauling your kids around to four different practices is killing you.
If you are a business person, it may be that working 14 hours per day is killing you.
It may be that you are trying to pack too much fun into your calendar. This may sound absurd, but there is such a thing as too much of a good thing.
Take some time to decide what you will say no to. It took 43 years for me to become comfortable with saying no (by the way, as I write this I am 43 & 3/4). Still a work in progress.
Now before you try and convince yourself that saying no is mean or a bad thing to do, let me stop you there. When you have the courage to say no you are clearing out room for a well-cultivated YES!
Unplug. I love technology! With that being said, please unplug from your virtual world for set periods of time. Facebooking, Tweeting, and surfing the net can be a major time suck. You will not be able to achieve balance if you are living your life through a screen. (If you did not include technology time in your non-negotiable list, then consider adding it now.)
Set some personal boundaries.
The purpose of boundaries are to protect. Saying no is one such boundary that will protect you.
The lines on our freeways are boundaries that keep us from crashing into one another. The boundaries set on a football field create order.
The boundaries we set in our lives will protect us physically and emotionally. Do yourself a favor and set some boundaries.
One such boundary might be that you will not work more than 50 hours/week.
Another could be related to friendships or other relationships. There are all types of people, some can suck the life out of you. Creating a boundary of when and where you are willing to interact with these type of people is a good thing.
Be kind to yourself.
Allow yourself some grace in this process. Finding the right balance for you can take some time. Rome wasn’t built in a day, right?
Allow tweaking to perfect your balance. If you fall off the wagon, just jump back on. As we talked about earlier, if you aren’t comparing yourself to someone else, you won’t beat yourself up as bad.
Today, more than ever, the lines of balance are blurred. A lot more is expected of us, both by others and ourselves. Creating a life of balance is critical to our well-being and as models to future generations.
Which steps in finding balance do you struggle with the most?
Do you have some helpful ideas to add to the list here?
I would really love to hear from you. Please comment in the box below.
Jill xo
Thank you Jill! I found this to be very helpful & encouraging. I will be working on my 10 things today.
Blessings,
Angel A. Cook
Thanks, Angel! Glad it could help. Hope you covered your 10 items. Let me know how it goes. Thanks for reading!
Thanks Jill! I find when I have less to do I feel more balanced. Love a weekend with no plans!
Yes, love a weekend with no plans too, Elizabeth. Thanks for taking time out of your weekend to read my blog.
Developing specific routines has helped me immensely. I was at a pivotal change time in my life when I read an article that said, “If you go to the dry cleaner the same day every week, when they ask you when you need to pick up, you don’t have to think about the answer since you always go the sane day.” I don’t use a dry cleaner these days but the principle is true. We used to find ourselves eating out too often and it was because we did not have food in the house that was easy to prepare after work. We started to go grocery shopping on the same day of the week, every week, with a list that kept our schedule in mind, and now we eat out to celebrate something, not because we are dead tired. We schedule our business and health related appointments, why not schedule the important aspects of our home and family management as well? Thanks Jill, great challenge!
Thanks, Nancy! Scheduling specific routines is a great plan. A nice way to leave your brain free to think about other things. Funny how home and family can fall to the wayside when it is of utmost importance to most of us. Appreciate your input and thanks for reading!
Great blog, Jill! I particularly like the second point. Life gets a lot simpler and more balanced when we stop living it for other people and do what we really want to do and believe in.
Thank you Sara. Amen to that!
Really helpful – thanks Jill! I am on the ragged edge – mainly because too many hours go to work each week. My goal is home by 5:00 – the fact is that I can’t even recall the “priority” that kept me at work late a few days after it happened – but I know my kids and I will remember swimming, playing, and movie night :). So my mantra for 4:30 every day this week – “go home now”. Your words will help me – thank you!
Deirdre, isn’t it funny how so many of us can let work take over our lives, when our families stand on the sidelines waiting for us to make them a priority. It’s great to see that you are thinking of their needs as well as your own. Love your mantra!! Appreciate your input!