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Your Daily Dose of Intentional Living

Hi, friend.  I’m so glad you’re here!

Watch my video message as I share a bit on my recent blog break and some fun news for the month of November!

Click here to head over to my Facebook business page.

Facebook LIVE “Your Daily Dose of Intentional Living” starts on Tuesday November 1, 2016.
Monday – Friday at 7 a.m. ET.

I’ll still be posting here on Saturdays with the week’s wrap-up, but be sure to watch the videos each day to make the most of your efforts in living an intentional life.  (NOTE: Not available at 7 a.m. ET?  You can watch the video at any time after the LIVE broadcast, too.)

Click here to download your free Intention Journal page and follow along each day recording your own thoughts and intentions for the day.

See you on Tuesday!

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6 Steps for Transitioning to Your New Normal

There are these huge waves on the Oregon Coast called sneaker waves.  They appear without warning, oftentimes catching an innocent bystander by surprise and whisking them out to sea.  There are warning signs posted on the beach, but like with many things in life, most people don’t think anything bad will happen to them.

I don’t know what it is lately, but I’m hearing from more and more friends, family members, and co-workers being hit by one of life’s “sneaker waves.”

Divorce, loss of a loved one, cancer diagnosis, break-up of a precious friendship, loss of a job, mental illness, problems with aging parents, personal injury.  Even things that aren’t supposed to be traumatic, like becoming an empty nester, or moving to a new city, can throw us for a loop.

The bottom line is that what was once normal, is now uncharted territory.  Transition to a new normal is necessary.

If you’re reading this, and are going through a tough time in your life, I encourage you to consider the steps below to help navigate through this difficult season.

Six Steps to Transitioning to Your New Normal   

Grieve the loss of the what wasGrieving is a necessary process when you’ve experienced loss.  It’s important to allow yourself to grieve the old normal, but be careful not to spend too long in the denial stage.  Depending on what you’re going through, denial can actually be a helpful tool your mind uses to help pace your emotions.  The key is not to get stuck there.

Manage your expectations.  Yes, life will be different now.  It can be helpful to outline in your mind or even on paper how the new normal might be.  Sometimes just getting a visual picture or a plan for what’s to come will help manage the ups and downs that are typical in these transitionary periods.  With this being said, read on…

Be flexible.  Remember that no matter how perfectly you plan and try to manage your expectations, there are bound to be setbacks.  This is normal.  It is, however, extremely important to be flexible during a difficult transition period so that you don’t add to the stress you are already undergoing.  Roll with the punches—as best you can–learn from your experiences, and get back on course.      

Replace the “hole” with something healthy.   After my mom died, I inherited a bunch of her cookbooks.  Not much of a cook before, I found myself diving into culinary experimentation.  Not only did I learn new skills, but I felt a connection with my mom while cooking—a void was filled.  When my son left for college and I became an official empty nester, I started this blog.  I knew I would have extra time and I didn’t want to fill it with watching tv or something else that wouldn’t benefit me.  Be careful not to let drugs, alcohol, or any other destructive activity fill your void…sometimes these things may feel good in the moment, but they are bound to cause trouble down the road.

Understand you’re not alone.  It can feel like you’re the only person in the world who has been handed such a crappy hand, who has been so heartbroken, or who has experienced so much pain.  No two people will have the same exact experience, but you can bet there are lots of people out there who’ve experienced something similar.  There will come a time when it’s important to lean in to such people.  Leaning in does not mean you’re weak.  Leaning in can be your saving grace.  Whether it be through a support group, a friend, family members, church members, or a perfect stranger who was set in your path for a reason you may not understand.  Just lean in, friends.

Start your gratitude journal today.  If you don’t already practice writing in a gratitude journal, today is the perfect day to start.  Maybe you can only come up with one thing per day, that’s OK, just write it down.  If you’ve already been in the practice of writing in a gratitude journal, don’t let any setbacks you’re experiencing prompt you to stop.  Expressing gratitude is wonderful in the good times, and can be a real life-saver in the bad times.  I wrote an entire post on journaling here, check it out for ideas and inspiration.

Here’s to reaching a place of peace and stability in your new normal.

Jill xx

As always, I appreciate you spending time with me here today.
Please share my blog with your friends, family, and co-workers.

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Journaling…The Benefits, Methods and Ideas

Dear Diary,

I’m feeling a little blue today.  I don’t know why, but maybe the lack of sunshine has something to do with it, or maybe it’s my sister!  We got in a fight today.  She can be sooo emotional and rude!!  I wish she’d move to Timbuktu.  Later today I’m going to the mall with Beth and Maryanne.  I hope I have a good time!  I’ve saved up $14 and I’m going to the pet store to see if I can get a turtle.  Mom’s calling…gotta go…   

If you’re female, this journal entry probably looks, or at least sounds, familiar.  I made this particular entry up, but I remember as a child the power of being able to write all your “young-self” thoughts and dreams down in a pretty little journal—mine, equipped with its own lock and key!

It’s been a few decades since I wrote in my first journal and over the years journaling has come in and out of my life.  Today, I have three different journals that I write in–a writing journal that I mind-map my ideas for future blog posts, a daily gratitude and goal journal, and a prayer journal.

No matter your age or gender, the process of journal writing can be very beneficial.  So much so, that I’m going to share with you the top five benefits of journaling, a wide variety of topics to journal on, and I’ll discuss physical and online tools for journaling and the importance of your journaling environment.

Let’s get started!

FIVE WAYS JOURNALING WILL BENEFIT YOU

Protect Your Sanity and Your Relationships.  Journaling can be like having your own built-in therapist.  There are times when it’s more productive and ultimately healthier for you to dump your unfiltered thoughts out on a page in your journal rather than dumping those thoughts out on your spouse, your friend, or your colleague.  Don’t you hate it when something comes out of your mouth that later you wish you could take back, but by then, the damage is done?  Some things are definitely better left unsaid, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try and work through those emotions with pen and paper.

Processing.  As I mentioned earlier, I use a journal to mind-map my writing ideas.  This has proven to be a fantastic way for me to creatively process and brainstorm ideas in a way that “just thinking” about them doesn’t.

On the other hand, processing may come in the form of working through emotional stuff that’s going on in your life, like I mentioned in the first benefit above.  Processing will generally bring clarity and a fresh perspective.

Hindsight is 20/20.  We can learn much from past experiences—good and bad.  This is of particular benefit when you use a “project” journal (more on this later).  When you journal through a project you will later be able to see what worked and where things may have gone wrong.  The details will usually appear more clearly when you’ve taken a few steps away from the actual experience.

This 20/20 hindsight vision can also be an awareness tool for unhealthy patterns that come up in our relationships.  For example, if you are in an unhappy or abusive relationship and you take a look back over your last year of journaling and see that you didn’t have one good day, then that written reminder may give you the strength and courage to get help or leave the relationship.

Time Capsule.  Your journals are a snapshot of times gone by.  Even if you have an excellent memory, you will never be able to remember all that you capture in your journals.  Whether you’re looking back to see how far you’ve come on a personal or professional level, or to remember the details of a trip you took years ago, a journal is an excellent way to preserve your thoughts, life’s milestones, and memories.  Journals can also be precious pieces of history to pass down to your children or other family members.  We’ll discuss privacy concerns later.

Deepening of Faith.  I have a friend that writes to God in her journal every day.  Getting things out of your head and heart and out on paper is a cathartic exercise and this type of daily communication to God has enriched her faith life profoundly.  She inspired me to start my own prayer journal, and although I am not as consistent as she is, I too, find this process enjoyable and rewarding.

NOT SURE WHAT TO JOURNAL ABOUT?
10 Ideas to Get You Started Today…

Personal Journal.  This is probably the type of journaling that most people think about when they hear the word journaling.  This style of journaling is a great way to pour your heart out and process through things going on in your life.  If necessary, keep your journal under lock and key.  I have a friend who keeps his personal journals in a small locked safe in his house.  His family has been instructed to get rid of the journals if he dies before them.  Not that there’s anything bad in them, it just gives him a sense of peace when he’s writing that he can be totally authentic and not worry about someone reading what he writes.  (Make sure to read about Journal Privacy rules below.)

Travel Journal.  You won’t regret journaling during your travels.  Not only will this type of journal serve as a memories scrapbook, but you can always go back and retrieve information for future visits or to share with others traveling to the same area.  Make sure to include favorite restaurants, hikes, monuments, hotels or B&Bs, bookstores, etc. in your journal.

Food or Dinner Party Journal.  Years ago, my mom used to keep a journal of dinner party details–who was there, what she served, and notes that might be helpful for next time those same guests came again.  This type of journal would be great for passing down to your kids too.  I don’t know where my mom’s journal went, but I’d sure love to have it.

Gratitude Journal. 
Life is good when you consistently express your gratitude.  As I mentioned earlier, I have one journal that I jot down a few things I’m grateful for every day.  A gratitude journal is fun to look back at over the years, because you’ll see times when you were obviously struggling to find things to be grateful for and other times when you write ten items down instead of your typical three.

Writing Journal.  I love my writing journal!  I mind-map most of my blog post ideas in this journal.  This process allows me to brain dump everything out on a page without worrying about editing.  Click here to see an article I wrote titled, “Mind Mapping: Who Should Use it And Why.

I generally carry my writing journal around with me too.  I don’t know how many times I’ve thought of a great idea to write about and if I don’t have my journal handy, I just hope that I’ll remember it when I get back home.  Nine times out of ten, I forget!  Sometimes I’ll just write one word or phrase down in the middle of a page and come back to mind-map it later.

Project Journal.  Whether it’s a home, work, volunteer project, or something in between, a project journal is a great place to store your ideas, plans, shopping lists, purchase information, etc.  Just like with a travel journal, you can go back to your project journal years later to remind yourself of that specific paint color you used or where you purchased that special lamp the dog just knocked over and broke into 22 pieces.

Goal Tracking Journal.  This is a great tool for personal and professional goal tracking.  I incorporate both gratitude and goal tracking in one of my journals.

Memories of Your Children or Grandchildren’s Lives.  My mother-in-law kept a journal for 12 years with notes from her famous “Grandma’s Summer Camp” that our son attended at her house one week every summer.  She has also keeps a separate journal for each of her grandchildren, full of special memories and thoughts specific to each grandchild.

If I could go back in time, I would have started a journal like this for our son when he was born.  Even if it only included the silly little things only parents care about or “kids say the darndest things” type quotes.  Think about doing this if you have young ones.

Prayer Journal. 
Talk to God.  Thank him for your blessings and tell him what’s on your heart.  I have a feeling that more people start these types of journals in times of desperation, and that is good, but if you use this type of journal in the good times too, your relationship with God will have a chance to develop on the mountaintops as well as in the valleys.

Drawing journal.
  Maybe you’d rather doodle than write words.  Doodle away, my friends!  Studies have shown that doodling helps improve memory, focus, and brain function.  Doodling is a good way to express feelings too…get those creative juices flowing and see where your doodling takes you.

METHODS OF JOURNALING
There are lots of options when it comes to journaling, from using a regular notebook to a fancy leather bound journal, to capturing your thoughts via an online tool.  Following are some options to consider.

Good ol’ pen and paper.  Check out your local stationery, book, or gift store for a good journal selection.  You can also search online (Google it) to find some unique journals.

Don’t do this: I used to get so caught up in finding the right journal, that I would delay the whole journaling process until I found just the right one.  This is fine if it takes a day or two, but I would go months without finding the right journal!  Trust me on this, just grab a notebook and get started.  If you really want to keep it in a fancy journal you can glue or tape the notebook pages in later when you find the perfect one.

Online Options:
Penzu
:  This is the best online journal tool I have found in regards to functionality and design.  It is super user friendly, private and secure, you can add in photos, and they will even email you a daily reminder to write.  I like that it looks like you are actually writing on lined notepaper too!  They have both a free and paid version.  Click here to check it out.

The 5-Minute Journal:  I’ve heard great things about this journal in its traditional book format and now they have an app for less than $5 that backs up your journal entries to your iCloud account.  This journal has five daily writing prompts, and for those that are time pressed, it only takes five minutes per day.  Click here to check it out.

EvernoteI love Evernote!  Although I’ve never used it specifically for journaling, I would use it if I ever switched from my preferred pen and paper method of journaling.  Evernote appears to have all the same bells and whistles that Penzu does, but you aren’t typing into what looks like lined notebook paper.  Evernote also has both a free and paid version.  Click here to check it out.

Microsoft Word:  A word processing option for not only your home computer but for your mobile devices as well.  Microsoft now has a Cloud storage option so you can access your data anywhere.  Click here to check it out.  If you are a Mac user, click here for info on Pages.

Google Docs:  Another word processing tool similar to Microsoft Word, but it’s online and it’s free.  Accessible on your PC and mobile devices.  Click here to check it out.

FINDING THAT SPECIAL PLACE TO JOURNAL

My environment is super important to me, especially when writing.  Obviously, you can journal most anywhere or anytime, but if you’re able to set aside a special place and specific time each day to journal, you are more likely to get it done and it makes the process more enjoyable.

You might like a cozy, quiet spot to have a hot cup of tea while you journal, while others may prefer a busy coffee shop setting.  However or wherever you do it, the most important thing is to block out time to do it.

JOURNAL PRIVACY…A final word

Don’t EVER read or share someone else’s journal unless you’re invited to.  Please respect the privacy of others.  We really shouldn’t have to use our lock and keys.
There are only two exceptions that I can think of to this important rule:
1.  The journal needs to be used as court evidence for a crime committed.
2.  Someone goes missing or dies and you expect foul play.

I’d love to hear from you.  Do you journal?  What’s your preferred method–are you an old-school pen and paper type or do you prefer online?  Is your environment an important part of your journaling experience?  How often do you journal?  Please share in the comments section below.

As always, I appreciate you spending time here with me today.

Happy journaling!

Jill xx