“The word that is heard perishes, but the letter that is written remains.”  Proverb

When is the last time you received a handwritten note that actually arrived in your mailbox?

According to a US Postal Service survey, 650 million personal letters were sent in 2012, down from 850 million in 2010.  That 650 million breaks down to one personal letter per average household every seven weeks.  The downward trend continues as electronic communications have become a preferred method by many.

We are blessed with amazing technology that keeps us connected day to day, but some things deserve more than words pecked out on a screen or keyboard and sent off with the click of a button.

For example, a sympathy note…

I can’t tell you all the opportunities I have missed over the years in sending someone a handwritten note, but let me tell you about the one that has prompted me to write this post.

Last year I found out through a Facebook post that a friend of mine had lost her father.  Along with many others, I sent an electronic message to her immediately in response to the sad news.

This was a close friend who I had lost touch with over the last couple of years, but regardless of the distance in seeing or speaking to one another, I loved her and I knew her heart was aching.

What I didn’t do, what I should have done, what I still haven’t done, was sit down and write her a handwritten note expressing my sympathy.  It wasn’t that I didn’t think about it.  I did!  I worried over not using the right words in the note, so days turned to weeks and weeks to months…still no note.

As time went on, I became embarrassed that I had not properly acknowledged this huge loss in her life, so that became the reason I didn’t send the note.

Guess what?

I am 274 days late, but I am sending my friend a proper sympathy note today.  There are no statute of limitations on kind words, right?!

Here’s what I’ve learned:

There are no perfect words.  It is especially hard to write to someone who has suffered a loss.  My best advice is to write from your heart and keep it simple.  The words matter, but the effort matters more.  Don’t be afraid of white space on a page…it’s the quality of your words that matter, not the quantity.

If you get stuck and are at a loss for words, click here for some wording suggestions that you can use for sympathy notes as well as a variety of other occasions.

Act quickly.  Oftentimes we don’t take action because we aren’t prepared.  Keep a stock of notecards/stationery and stamps handy so that when an occasion arises in which a handwritten note is necessary, you are ready.  If you don’t have anything on hand, a plain piece of computer paper will do.

You may want to print out some of those phrases or messages that we discussed earlier and have them right there with your stationery.

Write the note and get it sent out within a few days of the announcement or notice.

It’s never too late.  Don’t wait 274 days like I did, but if you do, don’t let your shame or embarrassment stop you from taking action.  You will never regret showing kindness.

Do you have a note that needs to be written?  Whether it’s acknowledging someone’s loss, the birth of a baby, a new marriage, the breakup of a marriage, or any other major life event, remember that written words are powerful and yours will mean more than you know.

Headed off to the mailbox now!  Have a great day!

Jill xx